宗教笑话|Who want to go to heaven 哪个想去天堂

The preacher was vexed^{1（生气的） because a certain member of his congregation（集合，聚会） always fell asleep during the sermon.}

As the man was snoring in the front row one Sunday, the preacher determined^{2 he would teach him not to sleep during the sermon. So, in a whisper, he asked the congregation. All who want to go to heaven, please rise. Everyone got up except the snorer. After whispering Be seated, the minister shouted at the TOP of his voiced, All those who want to be with the devil, please rise.}

Awaking with a start , the sleepy-head jumped to his feet and saw the preacher standing^{3 tall and angry in the pulpit（讲道坛）, Well, sir, he said, I don't know what we're voting on, but it looks like you and me are the only ones for it.}

牧师很生气，由于总有一个人在他说教时打瞌睡。

一个星期天，正当坐在前排的那个人又在瞌睡时，牧师决定要好好教育他一下，让他不要再在布道时睡觉。于是他低声对信徒们说：想去天堂的人，都请站起来吧。所有些人都站了起来当然，除去那个打瞌睡的人。在低声说过请坐后，牧师高声喊道：想去下地狱的人请站起来！

打瞌睡的人被这忽然的喊叫声惊醒了，他站了起来。看到牧师高站在教坛上，正生气的看着他。这个人说道：噢，先生，我不了解大家在选什么，但看起来只有你和我是候选人。